June is bike month...and the police are out to get you.

I was in a hurry. I had a dental appointment at 1pm, but I had about 40 books that I wanted to donate to the Vancouver Public Library. I couldn't possibly haul it to the nearest branch by foot, so I decided that biking to the VPL was the best idea--plus, it would save me some time. It would take two trips, but with a bike I figured I could probably do it in under 30 minutes.

"Hey ma'am.....MA'AM!!! *blows whistle* Could you step over here, please?" At this moment, out went my under-30 minutes plan. A power-mongering (obviously) police officer stood by his motorcycle and beckoned me over to the side of the road. What's going on? What crime could I have possibly committed in my final days in Vancouver? I swear, I haven't stolen anything, I haven't killed anybody, and these are all books I'm about to donate to the VPL! If anything I'm committing a very very humanitarian act by donating books. I am proudly contributing to the fountain of publicly accessible knowledge...

"Where is your helmet?" he asked.

Ah. Indeed, I wore no helmet. After all, I was only taking books to the library, which was literally only a few blocks from my house. This, of course, was no excuse. I was reprimanded further for not having a piece of identification. "You have a BAG on your back, and you're telling me you have no ID on you?" "Uhh...well my bagS are full of books I'm about to donate to the library." Apparently this revelation of my act of humanity in contributing to the fountain of publicly accessible knowledge didn't distract him very much from issuing a ticket that fined me $29 for not having my helmet on while riding my bike. Moments after issuing me this rather obnoxious ticket, the police officer stopped another, and then yet another, Vancouverite riding his or her bike without a helmet, just as they have been all year long. Pretty soon there was a crowd of bikes and people forming on the intersection of 8th and Macdonald.

I went out the rest of the day warning those on bikes that the police are out to get them. June is bike month, and now it is the end of June: hunting season. And yes, I do plan on paying the $29 to ICBC. I don't really want to get stopped at customs going out or coming into Canada in the near or far future.